Don't Be This Guy. See My Choices.

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

MEMENTO. The Movie That's Backwards!


Remember when you saw The Dark Knight and thought about how incredibly and darkly awesome it was? Or when you saw The Prestige and you were shocked and awed by the revealing plot twist that Christian Bale had a twin brother? (Yeah, I just ruined that movie for those who haven't seen it.  If you haven't seen it, why the hell haven't you seen it?)  Well, what if you couldn't remember seeing these movies at all, even though you saw them recently?  It just so happens that those two movies were made by the same man responsible for Memento, a thriller-mystery starring the ridiculously handsome Guy Pearce, Carrie-Anne Moss, and the annoyingly talented Joe Pantoliano.  A memento is something that reminds you of a person or event, and that's exactly what the main character, Leonard, needs every time he does basically anything.  He has anterograde amnesia due to a blow to the skull he received during an accident involving the rape and murder of his wife.  You don't know what anterograde amnesia is? Jesus Christ, have you been living underneath a rock for the entirety of your life?  Well, for the idiots out there, anterograde amnesia is obviously short-term memory loss, and throughout the entire movie, Leonard depends on polaroid pictures, tattoos, and little notes he wrote to himself so he can function as soundly as he possibly can.  The whole movie is told in reverse, starting with the murder of some guy and ending with...sorry, can't tell you, it might ruin it.  The joint is extremely intriguing and script is unbelievably clever.  If true, creative story-telling was the only reason a movie could be praised, this would be on the top of the list.  See Memento, it's fantastic.

Rating: TIGHT JOINT

Chick of the Flick - Carrie-Anne Moss

I know what you're thinking.  Who in God's name is Carrie-Anne Moss? Okay, I understand.  Carrie-Anne might be a little bit out of her prime.  Perhaps she never even had a prime and just happened to look good in shiny leather next to Keanu Reeves in The Matrix.  *collective realization*  Yep, she's the girl from The Matrix.  But today's movie is NOT The Matrix.  Nor is it Disturbia, in which she plays a supporting role as Shia LeBeouf's unfortunate mother.  Today's movie is.......

Song of the Flick

It feels soooooo good to be back in the blogosphere, my friends.  It's been far too long.  This hiatus, which I'm sure has prompted my vast amount of readers to have suicidal thoughts because they simply can't live without my written word, has come to an end.  I was doing hard time for stealing pixie sticks from  this four-year-old girl who rubbed me the wrong way.  She had it coming.  They didn't have WiFi in jail and I kept trying to escape to get to an Internet cafe because I knew how much you wanted me.  Alas, it made my stay in the joint a little longer than I would've liked, but it was all worth it because I did it for YOU. Yes, you.  Now while you ponder whether this actually happened, listen to this song I discovered while I was doing bench-press sets with Stabby Joe.  He slapped his wife with a spatula and got a year for assault.

Here's B.O.B. and Eminem with Airplanes Part II.